Not Afraid to Talk About It

I know this is an extremely controversial topic, especially in churches, but I'm not afraid to talk about it.

Birth control.

There are a ton of articles and opinions out there, and if you are trying to make a decision for yourself, I encourage you to do as much research as you possibly can. Understand I am not trying to tell anyone what they should do, and I do not think I have it all figured out, but I will share what Keaton and I decided worked for us. It is not the route everyone will choose, but it is something we feel comfortable with and we feel okay about.

My husband and I are Christians and yet, when we first got married, we did not feel as though we were ready for children at that stage in our lives. We are not against having children, and are actually looking forward to it soon, but we felt we needed to grow closer and more financially stable first. We maintained a long-distance relationship from the time we started dating until we wed, and my job required me to travel a TON during the first 6 months of our marriage. We enjoyed the first 7 months together, getting to know each other and developing a stronger marriage relationship. We used the Pill when we were first married.

We believe that God comes first in order of importance, then your spouse, then children. For us, in our unique relationship, we did not want to face temptation to put our relationship with our children above the relationship with each other before we were equipped; therefore, we chose to grow our own relationship first.

According to a lot of people, it can be argued that Keat and I were selfish in this regard. I do not fault anyone for feeling this way. Keaton and I did a ton of research right after we got married to see if using birth control goes against the Bible. We looked up sites like this and this, and many others, as well as studying the Bible.

I also read this book that teaches women how to monitor "fertile" and "non-fertile" days by using signals from your body. Of course, when you are on birth control, you are not supposed to ovulate, but part of the argument against birth control is that the Pill can lead to an accidental ovulation. The Pill also provides "back-up" precautions to prevent an ovulated and fertilized egg from being able to attach and grow, thus leading to a "self-imposed abortion".

This is what Keat and I decided to do: I did take the birth control Pill. I also continuously monitored my body using the information from "Taking Control of Your Fertility". I never showed the signs of this, but I was looking out for the signs of ovulation. Had I ended up accidently ovulating while on birth control, we would have ... well, you know ... refrained.

Anyway, to each his own, but this is what worked for us!