As of yesterday, Keat and I have been married for nine months! It hardly seems possible; time is flying. I don't usually take note of "month" anniversaries, but I thought I would share nine things I have learned about marriage so far.
1). Marriage is one of the most wonderful things a human can experience, but it is a lot of work as well. It's hard work, too, much harder than anyone truly told me before I was married. It definitely is worth it, though!
2). It is okay to not always go to bed at the same time as your spouse. This was something we were adamant about in the beginning, but I quickly realized it is much better for us both that Keat gets to sleep early (he rises early for PT). Since I have a hard time falling asleep, it makes us both cranky when I toss and turn and keep him awake. We've figured out a pattern where we read or watch TV together before bed, then I get up for a bit while Keat goes on to sleep.
3). Marriage is not what you see in the movies. Of course, I knew this, but still, there was a small part of me that hoped I would suddenly wake up every morning with perfect hair and no morning breath, and neither of us would ever feel the call of nature and stink up the bathroom. After the honeymoon, reality sinks in. After reality does sink in, however, you quickly realize that reality is not so bad! In fact, reality is pretty darn good.
4). The best thing Keaton and I decided was to never go to bed angry. That has saved us from excessive hurt on many occasions.
5). Communication is absolutely key. This one was very difficult for me, as I tend to keep my feelings inside, but it is so important to let your spouse into your deepest parts.
6). Assuming you have a good relationship, I don't think you can trust your spouse too much. There is nothing better than the security that no matter what, he or she will be thinking of you in every thing that they do.
7). It is important for each person to stay in contact with your families. Especially for us, being such a young married couple, I think it is vital that we maintain a good relationship with our parents.
8). Once you are married, don't forget the little things you used to do for your spouse. I remember when we were dating long-distance, we were always sending each other cards and emails and texts just to say hi. Things became a little more "business-like" after we were married, texting each other if we needed the other one to pick something up or to say we're on our way home, and never giving each other cards. I realized I really missed this! We've gotten back into our old habits a little bit more, and it's wonderful to get communication just to say hi. I think it makes both of our days a little better.
9). This is probably the most important: I will never learn everything there is to know about marriage - and that's okay! I am looking forward to learning more everyday, though!
